


Unbreakable

by Spnlover8813



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Amara - Freeform, Chuck Shurley is God, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff and Angst, God | Chuck Shurley Being an Asshole, Grief/Mourning, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-17 13:14:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 13,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28725684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spnlover8813/pseuds/Spnlover8813
Summary: Female reader insert, story inspired by the French Mistake episode of Supernatural. Reader finds herself thrust into a familiar but very different world than her own.
Relationships: Amara (Supernatural)/You, Castiel (Supernatural)/You, Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester & You, Dean Winchester & You, Dean Winchester/You, Gabriel (Supernatural)/You, God | Chuck Shurley/You, Lucifer (Supernatural)/You, Sam Winchester & You, Sam Winchester/You
Comments: 17
Kudos: 53





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfic, slightly edited & looked over by a close friend. Any mistakes are my own. Comments, suggestions welcomed. More chapters to come.  
> y/c- your color  
> y/f/c – your favorite color

**Chapter 1**

The day your life changed forever started like any other typical day. Wake up, shower, drag yourself to your small desk in your bedroom, and log in to your computer to start your workday where you would spend the next 8 hours of your life going through the motions, watching the clock tick by until 6:00 pm when your workday was officially over. You didn’t have a bad life by any means, just not exactly a fulfilling one. You were 30 now and painfully aware that you should be doing something more with your life than just existing.

You had grand plans once, plans to change the world, to be someone important, someone accomplished. But in what was supposed to be your last year of undergrad, you fell pregnant, you got so far behind and caught up in what you thought was the love, the relationship of a lifetime, that you never finished school. You gave up your dreams to be a Wife & Mother. Life went on, and you had your son, you worked one soul-crushing job after the other, trying desperately to be enough, to be a good wife, to be a good mother. Then one day, your world came crashing down, your husband asked for a divorce, you would later find out that he had been unfaithful the entirety of your relationship. You did your best to move forward, to be the strong woman your son needed you to be.

Thankfully you had an out, a nightly escape from your pain, all your burdens & anxieties. Every night since then, you had logged into Netflix & turned on Supernatural. You let yourself get lost in the world of the Winchester brothers. A world where magic, monsters, angels & demons were real, a world where against all odds, Sam & Dean kept on fighting, no matter what. The show saved you from the darkness that set in after the divorce, and it gave you hope to carry on. If Sam & Dean could go to Hell & come back, then you could undoubtedly overcome your personal darkness and fight to come out again.

So that is precisely what you had done. You fought with your internal demons daily. You fought all of your nameless demons that told you that you weren’t worthy of love, that you were fat & disgusting, that no one would want you, the ones who told you daily that you were a failure. You fought them tooth and nail with the inspiration of your beloved Winchester Brothers. You started to take care of yourself; you ate better; you worked out, you began to live again. You managed to lose all the weight that you had gained since your college days. Most days, you felt good about yourself. You were proud of your strength, the curves of your new body, and your courage to fight.

Most days were good, but your darkness still lingered in your mind, waiting to creep back in again to consume you. Today was one of those days, the one where you felt the weight of it, where nothing seemed to go quite right. After you had logged off work for the day, you made sure to make quick work of dinner and bedtime routine for your son. You made sure to do the things you knew would help make you feel better. You took a shower, you washed your long curly y/c hair, shaved your legs, and tried to scrub away the bad day. After you dried off, you pulled on a pair of comfy black leggings, tank top & threw on y/f/c over-sized hoodie overtop. You poured a glass of your favorite wine and settled into your recliner & got cozy, and turned on your favorite episode of Supernatural.

You awoke sometime in the middle of the night, still surrounded by the warmth of your favorite blanket in your recliner. The TV turned itself off while you were asleep, making your living room pitch black, although you couldn’t see, you had made the walk from your favorite chair to your bed so many times you didn’t even bother with turning on your phone flashlight. Suddenly you bumped right into a table that shouldn’t have been in your path, consequently knocking several bottles over that resounded in a loud crash. You were so stunned & still foggy from sleep you didn’t hear rapid footsteps coming from behind you. A bright light suddenly filled the room, and you were temporarily blinded by the brightness of it; shocked by it, you spun around and put your back to the table that shouldn’t have been there. It only took a minute for y/c eyes to adjust to the light and the scene before you.

You stood frozen, staring at the impossible familiar green eyes before you. You stood there staring for what seemed an eternity before you heard him gruffly demand, “Who the hell are you, and how did you get in here?” A million thoughts raced through your mind, ranging from _what the Hell???_? _I MUST be dreaming!!_ And Oh my CHUCK, _THIS CAN’T be happening!!_


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> y/f/n your first name

You stood there, eyes wide, staring down the man who you had dreamed of so many nights. You opened your mouth to speak and suddenly found your mouth so dry it was hard to force a sound. _What a great time to have a fangirl freakout… Come on! Speak woman; words use your words!_ you internally screamed at yourself. “y/f/n.. I..I don’t know. I just woke up here,” you managed to squeak out. “Sammy,” Dean yelled, turning his head slightly toward the open door while keeping his piercing green eyes laser-focused on you. It was at that moment you became aware of the gun Dean was holding pointed squarely at you. “I.. I promise.. I’m not here to cause any trouble.. I’m.. I’m not a monster,” you manage to stutter out. Seconds later, Sam bounds into the room and joins his brother to tower over you, his face focused & jaw clenched. He looks every bit the dangerous hunter that you know him to be. “Sam…. Dean.. I’m not here to hurt anyone.. please..” you choke out. “Sure, sweetheart..” Dean says sarcastically. 

Suddenly you are staring at the back of a very familiar head of soft brown waves and curls. “Ah Sam, Dean, great! I see you’ve already met y/f/n” Chuck said, turning to face you with a warm smile on his face. “And no y/f/n, this is not a dream.” It was then that your body, maybe partly due to all the wine you had previously consumed earlier that evening, but most likely due to the absolute fucking shock of meeting your most idolized fictional characters, decided that now would be the perfect time to rather dramatically lose consciousness.

You woke up to the sound of their voices, keeping your eyes shut, pretending to be out still, you let your head fall and face away from the sound of them. You opened your eyes. You felt the bed and saw the other small vintage iron white beds lined up, the white curtains that hung beside them. You knew where you were. You had just watched the episode where Rowena attempts to heal Jack on this same bed in the infirmary. You close your eyes again and listen. You aren’t ready to face them. You remembered Chuck telling you this wasn’t a dream before you passed out. He told you, but it was the only thing you were able to cling to because if this wasn’t a dream, you were in so much more trouble than you could ever realize.

“I brought her here to help Dean. Look, you were the one who said I did nothing all those years.” Chuck spoke to Dean much in the same rambling way he had first tried to explain the supernatural books to the boys all those years ago. “She can help us with Amara. She has a connection to her, much like you do, Dean.” You couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of his mouth. Sure, you had known about your darkness for years now. But what Chuck was saying was just beyond comprehension. At that moment, you realized that Chuck had no intention of sending you back home anytime soon. Your thoughts immediately went to your son, and you silently cursed yourself that he wasn’t your first thought. You felt your phone still safely in the front pocket on your hoodie. You pulled it out, at that moment, not caring or not if they noticed you had woken. You had to see his face, the face of your little boy. You hit the side button, and the screen lit up. You saw his face. The face you had loved more than anything else in your life, more than yourself.

In that moment, looking at your little boy, you found all the courage you needed. You were suddenly so filled with red hot rage. You stood up and walked right over to Chuck, ignoring both Winchesters. You stuck your finger right in his chest and poked him hard, staring into those deep blue eyes of his. “How dare you think that you can pluck me right out of my life and bring me here! I’m not some chess piece you can drag across and move! I have a son, and he needs me. He needs his mom!” Right after you said those words, well, more like you yelled them. _Wait, we yelled at him, we yelled at God. Well shit.._ you thought to yourself, instantly pulling your hand away from Chuck, still staring him, locked onto his eyes. What you didn’t see at that moment was the way Dean looked at you. The smirk on his face, the shock & awe that he regarded you with after you tore into Chuck. Dean realized in that instant that he had never been so attracted to a woman in his life.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing this has been way more fun than I anticipated. Slightly apprehensive about dialogue. I want to do these characters the justice they deserve. I've loved them dearly for the past 11 years. Comments are always welcome. I've been stupidly excited when I get the emails about new comments and kudos!
> 
> Radio Company. Lyrics to "Drowning" https://www.musixmatch.com/lyrics/Radio-Company/Drowning

What I can only describe as an almost sinister amused smile appeared on Chuck's face. “You don’t have to worry about him anymore. He’s with his mother now, so no, he doesn’t need you. When I took you from that world, I erased you from it. You were never supposed to be there in the first place. You were always meant to be here.” I felt the color drain from me, my rage replaced with an overall sense of numbness as I took in what Chuck had said. I didn’t even have a chance to form a coherent thought before Chuck had vanished again. I felt Sam’s hand on my shoulder, and he looked at me the way you would look at a wounded animal, big sad hazel eyes. I heard the words he spoke, but they didn’t register. I let him guide me down the corridor to a room between his and Dean’s that I could use as my own.

I absent-mindedly noted that Chuck, the complete & total dick that he is, did bring some of my things here. I tore off my hoodie and tossed it over my laptop on the desk, suddenly too hot all over to bear it anymore. I flopped myself on the bed. I stared at the ceiling for what seemed an eternity. The silence in the bunker at that point was deafening. I plugged in my phone and turned on my supernatural playlist. Ironic that my favorite Radio Company song, “Drowning,” started playing. I set it on repeat and closed my eyes, willing the music to take over my mind. I certainly felt like I was drowning. Every movement, every breath I took felt forced, slow & foggy.

_Hold the day  
Make it through and fall into the light  
All the way  
A carnival of causes and delight_

_Because we can't become  
Victim of a sum  
Cradle our desire  
To keep from drowning  
For all we know  
And all we've shown  
Crazy our survival  
To keep from drowning  
(To keep from drowning)  
(To keep from drowning)_

_To keep from drowning  
(To keep from drowning)_

_Because we can't become  
Victim of a sum  
Cradle our desire  
To keep from drowning  
For all we know  
And all we've shown  
Crazy our survival  
To keep from drowning_

_To keep from drowning  
(To keep from drowning)  
To keep from drowning  
(To keep from drowning)_

_Hold the day_  
Oh we pray  
To make it through the night

I’m not sure when sleep took me, but it was just after 6:30 am when I woke. All I could think about at that point was how badly I needed out. I needed out of this room and out of the bunker. I looked through the dresser and found a pair of black workout leggings, my strappy grey camo sports bra & a thin dark grey tank top. I put the clothes on quickly, along with my running shoes I found near my door. I found my headphones right beside my phone and promptly stuffed them in the pocket of my leggings. I slowly opened my door and prayed that it wouldn’t squeak. I didn’t feel like any running into either one of the Winchesters yet. I couldn’t stand for them to look at me with the pity they did last night after Chuck left. I left the way Sam had brought me last night and eventually found the war room and the stairs that would lead me to the bunker’s exit. I can’t accurately describe the feeling when I stepped outside in the early light. But it was like I could finally breathe again. I tugged on my headphones and turned on Halestorm’s _Into the Wild Life_ album to take me over as I began to run. I was almost back at the bunker entrance when I ran into Sam returning from his morning run.

Sam seemed surprised to see me this early in the morning. I’m sure he was used to being the only one up this early. If Dean was anything like the character portrayed on Supernatural, then he was NOT a morning person. Thankfully I avoided a rather awkward heart to heart with Sam since we were both rather sweaty at the time and in desperate need of a shower. He was nice enough to show me where the cabinet where they kept some extra toiletries & towels in the bathroom. Sam ever the gentlemen, told me to go ahead and shower first. I promised him I’d knock on his door to let him know when I was done. As soon as he left, I grabbed some shampoo, body wash & a towel out of the cabinet. I set them down by the shower and turned the knob to let the water warm up. I stripped out of my clothes and stepped into the warm spray. The show did not exaggerate about the water pressure in the bunker. It was like heaven and exactly what I needed after the hellish last several hours. After I was done attempting to wash my stress away, I stepped out and wrapped the towel around myself. Then instantly cursing myself for not thinking to go back to my room to get a change of clothes. I gathered my running clothes and determined to get myself back to my room as quickly as possible. I all but ran out the door and ran straight into a solid mass of muscle. “Woah.. Well, good morning to you too, Sweetheart,” Dean said, then formed that stupidly sexy smirk on his face.

_So, this is how I die, from extreme embarrassment. Awesome._ I thought to myself as I turned about 100 different shades of red.


	4. Chapter 4

I bolted to my room after that. I’m sure I couldn’t ever live that down. After my heart stopped pounding and reality seemed to come back to the forefront of my mind, I was determined not to let Dean see that me running him half naked had flustered me so badly. _Fuck Dean Winchester and his beautiful sexy ass face of his;_ my inner queen yelled at me. I pulled on a black V-neck tee, skinny jeans, and my favorite converses. I made quick work of scrunching my curls out and threw on some eyeliner and mascara, and I looked damn good. As I walked down the bunker hallway, I heard the shower as I walked past, figured Sam must have gone in while I was getting dressed. I made my way into the kitchen and braced myself. Dean was sitting at the table, handsome as ever with his coffee and a bowl of cereal. I steeled myself once again as I made my way over the coffee pot and poured some into one of the empty mugs near it on the counter. Just as I was about to will myself to speak to Dean again, Sam came padding into the kitchen, hair still damp from the shower with only a grey tee and jeans on. I forced myself not to stare at the man openly. I’m not sure if I was expecting them to wear layered tees with flannels all the time. But damn, the way that shirt clung to his broad chest should have been illegal.

I made my way over the table and sat opposite Sam & Dean. “So boys, I know you must have questions for me, and I really would like to know what Chuck said about me yesterday,” you started. Sam was the first to speak. “Well, Chuck didn’t tell us a whole lot. Just that you’re apparently from another universe where we are actors on a tv show.” “Oh, and that you and I have a similar connection to Amara and that you are her weakness.” Dean chimed in. “Well, I don’t exactly know how I’m supposed to have a connection to Amara like you do, Dean. I’ve never had the Mark of Cain, and as far as I know, in the universe, I’m from the mark is just a myth. I’m not anything special. I mean, yeah, when I watched the episode where you accidentally freed Amara, I guess you could say I was entranced by the actress that played her. Watching the exchange between you and her, surrounded by the black smoke, it felt like time stood still for me. I remember I had to re-watch it a couple of times because I couldn’t even focus on what was being said. I just assumed I was attracted to her. I mean everyone on Supernatural, they are ridiculously hot.” I clamped my mouth shut after that last bit of word vomit came running out my mouth and willed myself not to blush or look away from Dean. I swear I’m not going to give him the satisfaction of being embarrassed about the fact that I admitted to them both that they were hotter than Hell. Dean’s eyebrow arched & he winked at me as I watched him taking in that little admission of mine and storing that bit of information about me for later.

“The point is that I have no clue why Chuck seems to believe that I can help with Amara. Up until yesterday, everything I’ve seen or know about your world; was supposed to be just fiction.” You sigh as you start to wrap your finger around one of your curls framing your face. It’s a nervous habit, and these Winchesters are making you squirm. You try not to stare at either one of them for too long. Instead, you decide to study the little black specks on your ceramic coffee mug. Your nerves of steel from this morning’s run-in with Dean are quickly fading because he keeps looking at you like he is trying to undress you with his eyes. _No, he IS eye-fucking you; it’s the same look Castiel gets when he looks at Dean. Well, this should be fun. I hope Cas isn’t too possessive._ _The last thing I need is a pissed off Angel of the Lord,_ you think to yourself. “So I kind of know where I am in your timeline. Has Amara appeared to you again, Dean? Did she still take Casifer?” Sam and Dean both quirk an eyebrow at you. “Casifer?” they both question you in unison. “You know Casifer, Castiel+Lucifer, that’s what the fandom called him anyway. “Yeah, the bitch has Castiel, and from what I saw, he didn’t look good,” Dean says.

“Alright then, lets go rescue us an Angel boys!”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader's character revealed in this chapter. I hope you all are enjoying this as much as I am. I've been excited this whole past week hashing out the story line with my best friend. Smut will be coming shortly in the chapters to come, so get ready.

Apparently, let's go rescue an angel has a different definition to Sam & Dean... So here you are left alone in the bunker while they go investigate a lead on Amara, apparently, a toxic cloud killed everyone except one guy in Lewis, Oklahoma. Apparently, some chemistry professor named Donatello Redfield was the lone survivor, and given his profession, he was being held for questioning. When they shot you down about going with them, you didn’t argue, mostly because Chuck had decided to make an appearance again. Chuck made himself comfortable at the bunker, wholly unaffected by your animosity towards him, snapping up some Chinese takeaway in the war room. You meanwhile retreated to your room where you planned to stay as far away from that dick-head as humanly possible. The guys weren’t going to be gone long. Maybe 3 days tops, the town wasn’t too far away and with only one suspect to question it couldn’t possibly take that long. You knew Sam would figure out quickly that Donatello was a prophet, you didn’t completely remember everything in season 11, but you had a fair idea of the major plot points. Donatello becoming a prophet from Amara’s God power was definitely a major plot point.

So, you stayed in your room most of the time, tiptoeing around the Chuck-Damned bunker to avoid the bastard. You certainly weren’t going to throw a Lucifer-sized tantrum and blast music out of your room, not that Chuck would care, would he? Instead, you sat, listening to music, borrowing books from the library on angels, or anything mentioning God or the darkness, trying to figure out:

  1. How to get some sort of payback against the giant ass-hat Chuck. 
  2. How the fuck you were Amara’s weakness?
  3. What had Chuck meant when he said that you and Dean shared a similar connection to Amara.



Your mind swirled and tumbled around payback and the connection issue. You knew Amara had virtually no weakness. The only thing that had made Amara stop in the show was her brother Chuck, her family. All Amara wanted was her family, you knew that, you just didn’t know why Chuck didn’t get it.

It had been hours and you were halfway through your second book on Angels when you realized you had read the same couple sentences at least 5 times. Sighing, you got up from your desk and made your way over to your bed..

_It was weirdest feeling, as soon as you closed your eyes. A sense of nothingness, not bad, not good, just nothing. Apathy your first thought, this is the personification, the physical manifestation of apathy. You opened your eyes and you were no longer in the bunker. But in a cave, staring at the bloodied, dirty face of Castiel Angel of the Lord. The raised eyebrow and the smirk on his face told you that this was not Castiel. This was all Casifer and damn if he didn’t make you go all weak in the knees, even if you were terrified. Terrified not of Lucifer, although you knew you should be. But you knew this place, this is Amara’s hideout, where she was torturing him. You whipped your head around and thankfully didn’t see any sign of her and let out a sigh of relief. It was then that you realized Lucifer was staring at you, evaluating you, no, appraising you as his pupils dilated ever so slightly. “What are you?”_

It was the loud bang at your door that woke you. “You know you have to talk to me at some point, I can literally wait forever” you hear a muffled Chuck through the door. _It's funny that he knocks, Chuck, God respecting my space, HA…_ “You know, I am generally a nice guy when I’m not being yelled at.” Startled, you sit up in your bed and face the door, knees drawn to your chest as you stare at Chuck who apparently popped himself into your space after all. “You need to be more careful; you shouldn’t have gone to see him. You’re only coming into your power and he’ll be even more drawn to you, they both will be as they grow.” You cock your head to the side and look at Chuck with utter disbelief. “Power? What power could I possibly possess? What are you talking about Chuck?” “You always belonged here Y/N, with me, with Amara. We’re your family. Your real family.” You sit in stunned silence as Chuck continues. “I locked Amara away using the mark. The mark, it, didn’t contain her completely. No one knew, not even Lucifer, part of her essence remained. I took it to put what was left far away, so far that she wouldn’t even know where to look for it. Another universe, the world I created to hide you away from her. I created you, your soul, fortified you to contain the last of her essence that remained outside of the mark.”

You stared at him, trying to process what he had just told you. From what you could remember, Chuck didn’t lie on the show. His facial expression, the way he looked soften, not the hard, all powerful being you last saw. “So, what, Amara is really mommy dearest? And you, you’re my Dad? No, I saw the photos of me being born, I’ve had countless blood tests, MRIs, CTs done over the years. I’m human. No way am I the long lost daughter of the fucking Darkness.” Chuck walked and sat down at the other end of my bed and took my hand. “I know it’s a lot, but you are in fact those things. You are my & Amara’s daughter. You are the only being in all of creation that Amara has helped create. You are distinctly unique in that regard from all else in creation. You need to be careful now that you are here. Your powers are going to continue growing. Lucifer & Dean both will be drawn to you, anyone who bared the mark used to contain your mother, they will want to posses you. They will want to make you theirs. Don’t go to Lucifer again using your link again. The more time you spend here, the more your power grows, you will become irresistible to them. You can believe me when I say that Lucifer doesn’t share well.”


	6. Chapter 6

After the bombshell Chuck, Dad, just dropped, you were feeling more than a little shocked, to say the least. Never in a thousand years would you have guessed that this is what he had meant when he said you had belonged here, that you were Amara’s weakness. Did she even know about me? Could she know, I mean, how could she? I would assume getting trapped and locked away would have kept her pretty busy at the time. As if you weren’t worried enough about the eventual showdown with Amara before. Now all your anxieties about it were quadrupled. Foresight was your comfort; it was nice to know how things should all go down. But this, this was just too different. How would she react? Would she believe you; would she believe Chuck? As you wondered about that, you started to think about how Lucifer had looked at you. He asked you what you were. He could tell you were something more than Human. If Lucifer had picked up on it in the few minutes you were together in whatever dream-like vision, then Amara surely could recognize you in the flesh. Right? Thankfully Chuck seemed to dismiss himself after watching your reaction for a few minutes. You needed to be alone. You needed time to process what he had told you. It was a fucking lot!

You didn’t leave your room for the rest of the evening. You weren’t ready to face Chuck again, not yet. You knew you couldn’t very well avoid him forever. He was literally fucking God, and apparently, your Dad?! The rest of your night was spent in bed, headphones in, listening to music, and going through pictures of your family, the family that was ripped from you. The family that just provided a good hiding place, according to “Dad.” The photos of your boy, your baby, were painful to look at, tears spilling from your eyes. He was your entire world, your only real concern, one of the main reasons you kept on going just days ago. Now Chuck had replaced you, erased you from his life. You couldn’t decide if you wished he would have done the same to you as well. The pain, the grief was all-consuming. Finally, you let go, you let sleep take you as the melody of one of your favorite songs played in your ears. You prayed for a dreamless sleep, wishing that you could escape for a few hours from the pain. Your wish was not granted, as soon as you closed your eyes, you felt it again…

_The darkness surrounded you again, the emptiness, just as you thought the feeling or rather lack of feeling anything would consume you, you saw him, Dean Winchester. You were in some non-descript motel room, and he was asleep on one of the beds, Sam in the other just to the right of you. At least they weren’t awake. You would hate having to explain how you were here now. Were you here, or was this some sort of weird astral projection? You had tried to fall asleep in your room, just like when you had accidentally gone to Lucifer. You looked at Dean. When he was awake, you could hardly stand to look at him for more than a few minutes at a time. You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of him knowing just how badly you wanted him. But now, looking at him in the dim moonlight that shone through the curtains, he looked even more beautiful, younger, more peaceful than you surely would ever see him when he was awake. You took the time to really look at him. Look at him the way you wanted to the first time you saw him in person. You sat carefully on the bed next to him and took in his features, everything from his perfectly pouty lips, his sleep tousled hair to the bit of his anti-possession tattoo peeking out from under the sheets. A sudden shifting to your right and a yawn from Sam startled you, and you closed your eyes tight with fear of being caught, anticipating the shock and questioning you would get from both Sam & Dean once they realized you were here, instead of back in the bunker where they had left you._

When you opened your eyes, you forcefully let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding as you found yourself back in your bed. As much as you didn’t want to deal with Chuck, as much as you didn’t even want to particularly be in the same building as him, at this moment, you realized you did need his help. You had to figure out how to control whatever that was. You couldn’t just keep traveling to Dean or Lucifer every time you let yourself go. You needed to find a way to control yourself, at the very least, so you could sleep in peace. Sure enough, once you opened your door, the faint sounds of Chuck’s folk music were heard from the other end of the hall. The man loved to play it at all hours of the day and sing the same songs rather loudly in the shower. So, you walked down the hall and knocked on the door. “Chuck, can we talk? I need some help.” The door opened, and you were greeted by his smiling face. “Sure, kiddo come on in,” Chuck said as he walked back toward his bed to sit. “You said earlier that I needed to be careful. Not to go to Lucifer anymore, well, it happened again. Not with Lucifer, but as soon as I closed my eyes again to sleep, I popped up in Sam & Dean’s motel room. I need you to tell me how to stop it. Sam almost caught me.” Chuck patted the bed next to him, gesturing for me to sit next to him. I slowly made my way over and sat down carefully next to him, and faced him. He took both my hands and held them. “Close your eyes and relax. I’m going to try something.” Chuck said softly. I looked at him for a moment, the way he slightly smiled at me, the look in his eyes seemed sincere enough. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I felt it before I saw the blue flash behind my eyelids, felt the warmth of him, it was comforting, the only thing I’ve ever felt that was close was when I got a little too high that one time back in college, it was euphoric.

Then I saw them, two cords, glowing with a purple iridescent light. I wanted to touch them, run my fingers along them and caress their beautiful light. “What are they?” I asked Chuck, entirely in awe of what I was seeing. The light of them had to be the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. “Those are your tethers to Lucifer & Dean, an unforeseen side effect of the mark that was used to lock Amara away. It's how you have been going to see them both, your unconscious mind pulling you toward them. Hopefully that you have fully accepted and seen for yourself, you’ll have better control of when you go to them. But y/n, you still need to be careful. These tethers, aren’t just a one-way door. Don’t pull too much. I’m certain Lucifer will use it to his advantage once he realizes you are bound to him. I’m sure he already has his suspicions about you.”

I held out my hand and softly caressed the tether that glowed with a tint of blueish-white along with the purple. I felt it, the rage, and the raw power of the fallen archangel. I pulled back immediately and softly touched the other, the one that shimmered with the silver chrome color that reminded me of Baby. I felt Dean. He must have still been asleep because all I could feel from his tether was a gentle hum. It made me smile, remembering how peaceful he looked just moments ago. I opened my eyes and smiled at Chuck; “thank you.” “Now try to go get some rest. Sam & Dean will be back tomorrow.” Chuck said as he lightly patted me on the shoulder. I got up and went back to my room, much more confident that I would rest when I closed my eyes this time.

When I woke the next morning, I was determined to prepare myself the best I could for Sam & Dean’s arrival. I knew that it wouldn’t just be them coming, but they would be bringing along the newly minted prophet Donatello. Which only meant one thing, that we were very close to rescuing Casifer. Not only would I have to deal with Dean, now Lucifer would be here in the bunker too, very soon. I had no idea how I was going to deal with that. I was hopeful things would go at least similarly to how they went in the show and that Lucifer would be so focused on his Dad that he wouldn’t even notice me. Surely, I couldn’t have made that big of an impression on the archangel in our one brief encounter.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tiny bit of Smut incoming, you have been warned

I spent most of the morning going through any books I could find about Lucifer or archangels. After receiving more than one warning from Chuck to be careful with Lucifer, I decided that I needed to know as much about him as possible before he showed up. I knew his character, but he was no longer a character. This world wasn’t the fictional one I had watched for so many years. This Lucifer could very well be different, more unpredictable probably, and things were so off base already from how things were supposed to go. Chuck set up camp in the war room, with some more Chinese and Dean’s laptop. For an all-powerful being, he was certainly an oddball. The man couldn’t even be bothered to put on actual pants, opting for the boxers & tee combo while going through Dean’s laptop. I quickly vacated the area to retreat for my room once he was inundated with pop-ups for Busty Asian Beauties. It was weird enough for me to be pulled into this cluster fuck of a world. I couldn’t deal with my “Dad” going through Dean’s entire porn collection.

I was just finishing going through the last book I had pulled on Angels when I felt it. The tug in my chest, the tightness, my pulse quickened, and I felt the butterflies in my stomach. I found feet moving almost of their own accord leading me back into the war room. I stopped just short of the entryway to the war room when I heard the bunker door open and Dean descending the stairs, asking Chuck to cool it with the God stuff. Donatello was already squirrelly enough on his own. No need to freak the man out anymore. When I saw Dean, my heart fluttered. Again, my stupid legs seemed to have a mind of their own and carried me into the war room just as Sam & Donatello descended the staircase. I stood in the corner, trying to make myself invisible. I only vaguely registered the conversation Donatello & Chuck were having. All my attention and focus was on Dean. It was like staring at the sun. Beautiful, scorching, and intense, I could hardly avert my gaze. I had been around Dean a couple of times before this. Why was it so fucking hard now?

All I could think about was walking the few steps over to him and pulling him down for a searing kiss, grabbing him, pushing him back against the wall, and reaching down to undo his belt…

_I swear I can feel him, his soft pouty lips on mine. I could feel him, the shock that went through him as I pushed him against the wall before he relaxed into the kiss. I can feel his warm tongue swiping across my lower lip, begging for entrance, our tounges battling for dominance. I feel his hands wrap around me, pulling me almost flush against his hard body. I feel his hand slide down my back to grab onto my ass, pulling me into him. I can hear the grunt he makes when I pull on the lapels of his jacket to force him even closer to me. I can hear the gasp he makes as I run my hand over his thigh, lightly across his growing erection, till I find my way up to his belt. The leather feels so smooth & soft in my hand._

I shook the thought away and looked back up to see Dean smirking at me, looking me up & down before realizing my name being called by Sam. Apparently, I was to babysit the new prophet while the boys went out for a while. Making small talk with Donatello was easy. He was still so freaked out by the whole prophet of the Lord thing. He’s going on a mile a minute about being an atheist. I did my best to smile and look reassuring, but my mind was elsewhere, squarely on Dean Winchester to be precise. I kept thinking about Chuck’s words, that I would become irresistible to them. I couldn’t help but think that maybe it went the other way too. It would certainly explain the magnetic pull I felt towards Dean as soon as he got back. It had been just a couple of hours of half-heartedly trying to talk with Donatello before the boys got back. As soon as you saw Sam come through the door, you made your escape back to your room as quickly as you could, without making it seem like you were actively running away from them. You knew it was only a matter of time before Dean & Sam would use Donatello to find Casifer, and you still hadn’t sorted out a plan for his arrival.

You stayed in your room all evening, only coming out late that night, tiptoeing to the kitchen to get some snacks. You needed time to prepare, to get some space from Dean. If earlier this afternoon was any indication, you certainly couldn’t keep your mind straight around him anymore. You spent the night throwing up angel warding in your room, putting up every single sigil you could find. Hopefully, it would be enough to keep Lucifer out. Out of your room, at least, out of your mind; however, that was an entirely different matter. You could only hope he wouldn’t find your tether to him. You’d be lying to yourself if you said you weren’t attracted physically to him. However, this was Lucifer, and you would be out of your mind to not be terrified and at the very least conflicted about the attraction you felt toward the fallen angel. Casifer, after all, was your not so guilty pleasure while watching Supernatural, something about Lucifer’s sass in Castiel’s vessel, it was perfection, definitely one of your favorite vessels for Lucifer besides Nick.

After the warding was completed, you tried to settle your mind. You ended up just going through old pictures of your family and son on your phone. You had lost people before, family members you loved when they died. But this was different. No one had died. You’d just been taken and then obliviated from their memories, much like something out of Harry Potter. You felt guilty about not being more of a mess, and mostly you just felt numb to the pain you knew was eventually going to come. Everything about this world was a constant shock to the system, and it seemed inconceivable that this was your life now. After torturing yourself with old pictures for Chuck knows how long you eventually fell into a dreamless sleep. You woke to a loud crash from somewhere in the bunker. You glanced at your phone to find that you had slept well into the afternoon. Pulling your hair up into a messy bun & after giving yourself a once over, you went to find the source of the crash. You felt the pull again in your chest, but it was different, colder. You rounded the corner standing in the entrance to the war room, staring past Chuck, into those ocean blue eyes that you would recognize anywhere. _Casifer_


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realized I've been switching back in forth between 1st & 2nd person while writing. It wasn't really conscious choice on my part. This chapter is all in first person, hopefully it'll provide some better continuity. Hope yall enjoy this bit of Casifer, I know I did..

He was beautiful, he glowed the haziest white, his blue eyes glowed they were simply stunning. I was dumbfounded, stuck rooted to my spot in the entrance to the war room. I knew I should be hiding from him, Lucifer was a loose cannon. But as I continued to stare into his eyes, the world just seemed to disappear, it was only me and those breathtaking orbs of the deepest blue. I only snapped out of my trance when Lucifer was suddenly stalking toward me, he grabbed me roughly by the arm. Then the sudden feeling of my world spinning around me made me involuntarily close my eyes, when my stomach felt like it was in the right place again, I opened my eyes to see his staring back at me intently. We weren’t in the war room anymore, we were in some random bedroom within the bunker, I recognized the dated furniture and cement walls. I back away from him, hopeful I’ll find the door somewhere behind me to escape. My hopes are quickly crushed when my back hits the solid cold wall behind me, Lucifer stretches out his arm beside my head and moves closer to me, almost toe to toe. He’s effectively caged me in with his between his body and the cold wall. “What are you? You certainly aren’t one of Dad’s little apes.” Lucifer asked while cocking his head slightly to the left while seemingly staring right into my soul. It feels like my heart is in my throat, my stomach seemingly has formed itself into the tightest knot as I’m struggling to form a coherent thought. I somehow manage to studdered out my name. Hopeful that will appease him enough to let me make my escape.

No such luck, Lucifer moves even closer to me, his hand that was on the wall, reaches down to caress my cheek and jawline. His hand is cool to the touch, it feels intoxicating, cooling my skin where he touches and sending a slight shiver and goosebumps throughout my body. I find myself leaning into his touch, it feels right. “You will tell me what you are pet. You will tell me what you have done to me.” Lucifer spoke softly his hand gently lifting my jaw up so he could stare into my eyes. I was surprised that he could be so gentle, I always expected him to be full of fire, forceful, demanding. This version of Lucifer that I was dealing with was something completely unexpected. I realized that I had been quiet for too long when he quirked his eyebrow up expectantly at me.

It's like I could feel all rational thought leaving my body at that moment. One domineering look from Lucifer was all it took and I felt like I could tell this man anything. It made me weak at the knees and if the wall if the cold wall wasn’t pressed against my back, grounding me I would have surely melted right into the floor. “Chuck made me.” “Obviously pet, Dad made everything.” Lucifer said as he was leaning toward me, then into my ear he lightly growled “What are you, why have you been haunting me, coming to me at all hours?” before nipping at the shell of my ear. I bit back a moan as he nipped at my ear, trying desperately not to squirm underneath his touch when I felt his other hand wrap around my waist to the small of my back, pulling me closer towards him. This was going downhill fast and I could see it going like a crash in slow motion playing in my mind. No way in Heaven or Hell this was gonna go right. I swallowed the lump in my throat, willing myself to just say it. No use in lying to the Father of lies. After all, Lucifer would see through it and maybe just maybe the truth would shock him enough to loosen his grip on me. “No.. Chuck he really did make me, he merged the last part of Amara with me. The part of her you couldn’t trap with the mark. I’m kind of like their daughter?” I rambled out my confession as fast as I could, trying to squirm to get out of his embrace. I couldn’t move, not an inch. I forgot how to breathe when I looked up at him again, he was staring intently at my lips before his eyes slowly made their way back up to look into mine.

Suddenly his lips crashed into mine, his kiss was urgent, forceful as he pressed me further into him. It was a heady feeling. I couldn’t think, he was all-consuming, he felt so right. I gasped when I felt him roughly squeeze my ass, he used the opening to push his tongue inside my mouth, devouring me. I lost the last bit of control I had over myself at that moment. I pushed my hands under his trench coat and his suitcoat to grip onto his button-up tightly as I pressed my chest flush with his as we kissed. Lucifer took his other hand that wasn’t currently on my ass and put it in my curls, wrapping a few around his thick fingers, suddenly pulling my hair. I gasped as my head was pulled to the right, his lips suddenly kissing and nibbling down my jawline to my neck. When he reached the slight valley between my neck and collarbone, he kissed me roughly, sucking my skin before biting down on me. I hissed at the sudden pain. Lucifer pushed his knee between my legs right onto my clothed core. The slight friction felt like heaven and heavily contrasted with the almost painful attention he was giving my neck. It was intense, overwhelming, I closed my eyes and moaned as he moved on to a new spot on my neck, seemingly satisfied with whatever mark he had just made on my skin. It wasn’t till I felt him roughly on my mouth again that I remembered.

Remembered all the warnings Chuck had given me, all the preparations, my plans to stay far away from the fallen angel and I was suddenly very afraid. I squeezed my eyes shut, picturing my room, all the sigils and warding that I had meticulously put up just a few hours earlier. It was like as soon as I thought about it, I couldn’t feel Lucifer anymore. I opened my eyes and I was in my room, standing up against the wall next to my bed, staring at the warding I had placed near my door. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the aftermath of your run in with Lucifer, you start to change into the person you were always meant to be.

I stood there staring at the wall, absentmindedly running my fingers over my swollen lips. Stunned by the fact that I was suddenly in my room and not within Lucifer’s grasp any longer. I stood there for a couple of minutes while my brain tried to process that I’d poofed myself back into my room. My legs shook as I walked the few steps to my bed. All I wanted to do was call my best friend and tell her about everything that had happened. I pulled my phone out and was about to press the call button before looked down at her picture in my contacts. I remembered that not only had I lost my son, the only family I had really cared about. I had lost her too. I had no one. No family here, not any family that mattered, just because Amara & Chuck were my supposed “real” parents didn’t mean a damn thing. They were strangers. I was alone. No family, no friends here in this world full of monsters, celestial beings, and every other dark creature. I put my back against the head of the bed and pulled my knees to my chest, my eyes burned with the tears that refused to fall. My chest felt impossibly heavy and something in my soul click into place. I was never going home. This was it for me, whatever Chuck had planned, whatever my destiny with Dean and Lucifer may have been, this was my life now. I’m not sure how long I sat on my bed like that, but when I went to move my legs burned in protest of being stretched out again and my arms ached from holding onto myself so tightly. I felt the same numbness, although maybe numbness wasn’t the right word, detached possibly. Whatever it was, it was better than the pain and I fully intended to embrace it. But first things first, shower, then onto being the badass daughter of the darkness.

After a shower, dressed in my favorite pair of jeans & a black v neck tee, my mind felt clearer, like a fog had lifted. Whatever feeling that had settled deep into my chest hadn’t gone away, but it didn’t feel wrong, I felt powerful. After combing through my damp hair, scrunching up my curls I took inventory of myself looking into the mirror. I still looked like me, same curly hair, same pale skin. The mark Lucifer made on my collar bone was mostly covered up by my shirt, only a slight reddish tint peeking out. As I studied face closer, I was shocked. My eyes had changed, they weren’t the y/e/c I was so used to seeing staring back at me. Now my eyes were the most beautiful deep blue that faded into a breathtaking purple haze that made my irises glow softly. They were beautiful, unlike anything I had seen before in my life. A wicked smile form on my lips as I finished up with my make-up. Looking at myself, I looked hotter than hell. I grabbed my cell and slipped on my shoes. It was already well into the evening again by the time I got done dressing and I had the perfect plan. If I was going to be stuck here, then I was going to get out of this damn bunker and have some fun, and I knew the perfect person to help me out.

I didn’t have to search too far for Dean, he was just coming out of his room at the same time I had left mine. “Hey Dean, so I was thinking, we should get outta here for a little while. Not like we, just me and you, obviously Sam too. Since Lucifer is here and all, I know you two aren’t exactly in his fan club. We should go to a bar, give Luci some time to work out his Daddy issues.” “Sounds like a plan Sweetheart,” Dean said with a smirk. It didn’t take any convincing for Dean or Sam to hop on board with my plan. I’m sure they wanted to get out of the bunker just as badly as I did and get some space from Lucifer. A short 15 minutes later I found myself in the backseat of the sexiest car on the planet, I had to keep reminding myself not to completely geek out over being in Baby. I couldn’t even remember how many times I had fantasized about being laid out in the backseat with a certain Winchester over me, I subconsciously rubbed my thighs together at the thought. Being so close to him, the man who over the past 10 years had been the object of most of my lustful thoughts was almost too much for me to handle. I bit my lip catching his green-eyed gaze in the reflection of the rearview mirror, the man was sex on a stick. Hell, they both were, I never considered myself much of a Sam girl before but being this close to him, his muscular shoulders right in front of me, _damn_.

When we finally pulled up to the bar, I smiled all to myself about how very similar this one looked to the roadhouse portrayed in the show. We made our way inside and Dean headed straight for the bar to get drinks for us, while I followed Sam to get a table, we grabbed a high top and Dean brought back beers and shots. After downing a couple of beers, I felt the familiar warmth come over me that came along with lower inhibitions. “Be back boys, need more shots” I said patting Sam on the back making my way to the bar, swinging my hips with more confidence now that I had some good old fashion liquid courage flowing through my veins. As I ordered another round of shots for us, I spotted the sign and little stage off to the side of the bar for karaoke night, I squealed with excitement as I saw the sign-up list at the end of the bar. I always loved to sing and had the perfect song in mind to sing, to celebrate me fulling embracing my inner badass & also had the added benefit of being a good way to tease Dean and hopefully get the man worked up. I quickly downed an extra shot before heading back to the boys. I set the shots down at our table and pulled my top just a bit farther down, a bit of extra cleavage couldn’t hurt. “Y'all should sign up for karaoke! Come on it’ll be fun!” I said with my best puppy dog eyes looking between Sam & Dean. Sam threw his hands up and in no uncertain terms shot me down. Dean took his shot and smiled at me “Oh No way princess, not happening.” “Come on, Dean freaking Winchester, badass hunter of all things that go bump in the night is afraid of a little singing?” “Am not.” “Okay, prove it. You can go after me! I’ll show you how it's done, big boy.” I said as I got up, pressed a quick kiss on his cheek, and made my way to the bar to sign him up.

While I was on cloud 9 after coercing Dean to sing, making my way to the bar, I missed the way Dean’s face flushed red as he stared at me walking back to the bar. Sam chuckled “Dude, you’re so fucked.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was inspired by Halestorm's song "Amen".

After a couple more beers with the boys and listening to what must have been the worst rendition of “livin’ on a prayer” ever, it was my time to shine. I smirked to myself and swung my hips as I made my way to the microphone. This song was my favorite and I’d been singing & practicing it for years. I know I have a decent voice and this song fits perfectly into my range. Normally, in my past life, well I wouldn’t have dared singing this song anywhere except the confines of my car, alone. But the old me was gone, dead, her departure started the moment I arrived and stared into those breath-taking green eyes for the first time. By the time I reached the little stage, it felt like my whole body was on the edge of vibrating, my heart was beating steadily in my chest and when my music started up I settled my eyes on Dean & Sam and started singing. If I was going to try and tease the man, might as well really go for it right?

_A fire's gotta burn  
The world is gonna turn  
Rain has gotta fall  
Fate is gonna call  
But I just keep on breathing  
Long as my heart is beating_

_Someone's gotta hate  
It's never gonna change  
Gets harder everyday  
It's a hell of a place  
To keep your heart from freezing  
To keep yourself believing_

_But I won't run  
I'm not afraid  
I'll look em in the eye  
Gonna hear me say  
It's_

(I took a big breath and locked eyes with Dean and started singing again with all the sexy confidence I could muster)

_My life  
My love  
My sex  
My drug  
My lust  
My God, it ain't no sin  
Can I get it  
Can I get an Amen  
My grace  
My church  
My pain  
My tears  
My hurt  
My God, I'll say it again  
Can I get it  
Can I get an Amen_

_Can I get it  
Can I get an Amen  
Can I get it  
Can I get an Amen_

_Life has gotta kill  
Faith is gonna blind  
Hope is gonna fade  
The truth is gonna lie  
Sometimes there's no reason  
To justify the meaning_

(I closed my eyes gripped the microphone a little tighter, and swung my hips, dancing as I sang my favorite part, my whole point in picking this song in the first place. My declaration to myself, a vow to myself. I’m not broken.)

_ But I won't run  
I'm not ashamed  
 **It's gonna take more than this for me to break** _

_My life  
My love  
My sex  
My drug  
My lust  
My God, it ain't no sin  
Can I get it?  
Can I get an Amen?  
My grace  
My church  
My pain  
My tears  
My hurt  
My God, I'll say it again  
Can I get it?  
Can I get an Amen?_

_Can I get it  
Can I get an Amen  
Can I get it  
Can I get an Amen_

(I took a deep breath, preparation for the crescendo that was coming. I found those green eyes staring back at me so intensely, I felt a slight burning behind my eyes, from what I assumed was just a flush from noticing how Dean was looking at me.)

_My life, my love, my sex, my drug  
My lust_

(I’m sure I had never nailed that crescendo so hard before in my life. My voice almost matching Lzzy Hale’s raspy scream.)

_My life  
My love  
My sex  
My drug  
My lust  
My God, it ain't no sin  
Can I get it?  
Can I get an Amen?  
My grace  
My church  
My pain  
My tears  
My hurt  
My God, I'll say it again  
Can I get it?  
Can I get an Amen?_

My heart was pounding, the slight burning, tingling sensation behind my eyes hadn’t gone away yet. At this point, I chalked both of those sensations to the adrenaline that was surely pumping through my body as I made my way over to the boys. When I got back to the table, Dean had suddenly found something on his phone very interesting. Sam slung an arm around my shoulders. “That was awesome Y/N! But uh we need to get you back to the bunker, like now. Ready Dean?” Dean made an indistinguishable grunting noise in affirmation. I looked up at Sam and cocked my head to the side, “thought the whole point of tonight was an escape from the bunker? It's still so early! Come on Sam, Dean?” I looked between them with pleading looks. Dean finally looked up and met my eyes for the first time since I got back. “We can’t have you out here looking like this, come on we need to go now.” Sam pushed my shoulders and I let him guide me out to the parking lot. I stopped, unmoving, Sam tried to push me a little more toward the impala door, but I dug my feet into the pavement unmoving. _You would think Sam could get me to move more easily, maybe he just wasn’t trying to hurt me._ “What in the actual hell guys? Dean, what the fuck do you mean I can’t be out here looking like this? What the fuck does that mean?!” I yelled at them both, locking eyes with Dean the whole time. _I must have drunk a little too much,_ I thought as I felt the tingling sensation from earlier intensify.

Dean, exasperated, ran a hand down his face and made some gesture towards me with his other hand. “This, that, you can’t look like out here” I crossed my arms and glared up at him. “What the exactly are you getting at Dean!” I spit out harshly. Sam sighed loudly and took his phone out of his pocket and held it up in front of my face like we were gonna take a god damned selfie. “WHAT THE FUCK SAM!” “Just look!” It was my turn to sigh loudly and I focused on the image on the cell phone. I made a faint gasp and quickly put a hand over my mouth as I studied my eyes. The faint purple haze on the edge of my irises from earlier had completely overtaken the blue, my eyes were glowing brightly the same shade of violet. I looked like some sort of angel; it was exactly how Lucifer’s eyes had glowed after he had been healed. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, now wishing that I hadn’t drunk so much, my head was spinning. The tingling sensation lessened somewhat as I took another breath and tried to relax. I felt Sam gently trying to corral me into the back of the impala, I let him. Probably was for the best that I was back at the bunker. Certainly, didn’t need any more power fuck ups, while drunk at a random bar in the middle of nowhere Kansas.

I sat in the back of the impala watching the scenery pass by as we made our way back, the bright moonlight illuminating the tree-line as we got closer to the bunker. I closed my burning eyes, desperately trying not to think how the forest reminded me of the one outside my home. I could picture it perfectly, the tall pine trees, the maple trees, the tall strong oak tree that stood on the edge of the forest by my house. The swing that I had put up a few summers ago on that tree. I could see him, my perfect little boy, his golden hair slightly blowing in the wind as he finally learned how to pump his legs and swing himself higher and higher. I saw the porch, the weather faded white rocking chairs I loved. I felt my stomach flip and closed my eyes shut tighter and almost fell completely forward down the steep steps I was now sitting on. I opened my eyes and saw the swing. My heart pounded so hard in my chest I thought it would burst, I almost fell, rising to my feet, I turned around to see the dark house, the white billowy curtains missing from the big picture window. As I approached, I could see that the house was empty, no toys thrown about the fluffy white rug haphazardly, no family photos hung on the walls. It was just a hollow shell, a cheap counterfeit of the home I had shared with my son. The home where he took his first steps, said his first words, the home I had imagined him growing into a man in, bringing home his first date, the home where I would have made a life in with him. The burning behind my eyes was so intense, the pounding so loud in my ears, I could hear blood rushing in my ears. I just caught the reflection of my eyes in the glass, blazing an intensely cold violet bright light before glass cracked and shattered violently before me. I shook with a rage so intense, whole body vibrated, goosebumps on my arms as I whipped around, my back toward the house. I screamed into the night like a banshee, my voice echoed in the night, the glass of the streetlights bursting & sent sparks out across the road before going out completely. Glass shattered forcefully out of the rest of the windows on the house. The brash sounds of glass shattering filled the rest of the street, glass forcefully thrown into the road, the moon shining on the shards of glass like a million diamonds against the black pavement.

The night was eerily silent & still as I started walking down the street, the cool Carolina breeze chilling my skin, not even the comforting scent of the pine trees would quell the fury I felt. _I wonder if this is how Lucifer felt when Chuck threw him out of his home in heaven and down into the pit._ I felt a cool hand wrap around my arm from behind me, I swiftly turned to face him, violet eyes shining brightly into Lucifer’s blue ones. “Lucifer! What? How did you find..” Lucifer cut me off by pulling me into a searing kiss. Despite myself, despite my promise to stay away, I found myself relaxing into his embrace, his cool lips against mine, his hand on my back pressing me into him. It was pure ecstasy. He pulled back just far enough to look down into my eyes. “Let me help you pet” he breathed against my lips. I was at a loss for words, looking into those dark ocean eyes, I stood on my tiptoes, and kissed him, desperately, clinging to him, my hands gripping the back of his trench coat. “Yes,” I replied breathlessly.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry its been a while since my last update. Family life got in the way. I'm glad I've got this one done, been plotting out this chapter for a while. There are some POV changes and a slight time jump. I enjoyed writing this chapter immensely. I live for comments & kudos, it really makes my day, feedback is glorious! I love to hear what you all think.

I closed my eyes and pressed myself into him even more, clinging to him like he was my last lifeline. I barely noticed the world shifting around us, the world didn’t matter, nothing mattered except us. He’s intoxicating, like my very own personal brand of heroin. I only opened my eyes again once I felt him kiss the top of my head, I smiled looking up at him. He took my hands firmly into his, dragging them away from his waist, stepping back slightly “Come with me pet”. I nodded my head yes, knowing that I’d follow him anywhere.

Dean’s POV – Earlier that night

She was so quiet on the drive back to the bunker. I kept having to tear my eyes away from the rear-view mirror and back to the road. I could look at her for hours, but if I didn’t keep my damn eyes on the road, I was gonna run Baby right off the road. _Just one more time_ I thought to myself as I looked up into the mirror again, she looked so beautiful, her curls hiding part of her face from me as she stared out the window towards the woods. I heard the whimper she made as slumped her shoulders and closed her eyes. I tore my eyes away, back to the road. Only a few more minutes and we’d be back at the bunker. My chest was so heavy, it was like I could physically feel her anguish. Fuck what is wrong with me? I barely know this chick. Doesn’t matter. I’m gonna make sure she never has to feel like this again. Nothing and no one will ever hurt her again, not if I have anything to do with it. It’d only been about a week since the night I’d found her in the Dean cave, but I couldn’t get her out of my head. She was on my mind constantly & in my dreams, fuck especially after she ran into me in just that little towel. I’m sure by now Sammy had caught on to my crush, especially after the way I couldn’t take my eyes off her tonight. I internally groaned & ran my hand down my face just thinking about the teasing and snickering I was going to have to endure from him. After I parked Baby in her spot in the garage I looked up into the rear-view again, my stomach dropped, not expecting to find the backseat empty. I smacked Sam in the chest. “Dude, what the hell?” “She’s gone, Sam.”

Reader’s POV

I let Lucifer lead me into the cabin, from what I could see in the darkness it looked like something straight out of a Nicholas Sparks novel. It was a wooden cabin with a big wrap-around porch with a couple of rocking chairs and a loveseat swing set up in one of the corners of the porch that I could see. Stepping inside, the main room was drenched in a soft warm light from the big rock-faced fireplace in the middle of the room. He led me down a short hallway to the right and stopped in front of the door. He turned to face, leaned down, and placed a soft kiss against my lips. “Rest now little one.” He kissed the top of my head and then pushed open the door before gently pushing against the small of my back, guiding me into the room. I took a few steps into the room and turned when I realized Lucifer wasn’t following me. “Aren’t you coming?” “I don’t require sleep, go rest now, I’ll find you in the morning little one.” As I turned around to venture farther into the room, I heard the soft click of the door closing behind me. This place like something straight out of my dreams. It was beautiful, large windows lined the far side of the room, the pale moonlight soaking the room in soft glowing light. A large king-sized bed against the wall adorned in fluffiest white duvet I’ve ever seen with matching large pillows. I toed off my shoes by the large dresser and walked across the cool wooden floor to the open door to the left of the bed. It led to a large, but cozy bathroom, a large deep claw-footed tub stood in front of large windows, much like the ones in the bedroom. This place felt like a dream that I was surely going to wake up from at any moment. I filled the tub up with the hottest water and as I soaked in that glorious tub until I felt my muscles relax, all the tension of the past few hours, the heartache & rage leave me. Afterward making my way to the bed, it felt like I was floating rather than walking, I hadn’t felt so at peace since coming to this reality. I snuggled up in the middle of that big cozy bed and fell into a deep and restful slumber.

As I slowly came to consciousness, it was too bright, the windows that I had admired last night, letting the sunlight pour into the room. I sat up, blinking my eyes open, trying to adjust them to the bright morning light. I stretched my arms out & rolled my head side to side, letting the covers fall down my bare chest to pool around my waist. “Mmm Good Morning to you too pet” I quickly jerked my head toward the windows to find Lucifer casually leaned up against one of the windows, his eyes roaming over my exposed chest, wearing a smile that made the heat pool between my legs. He practically glowed with the bright sunlight coming in from behind him, he was just dressed in his white shirt & trousers. The first few buttons of his shirt left undone, letting me see a peak of his muscular chest underneath. He had rolled up the sleeves showing his strong forearms and with his arms crossed against his chest, looking like he just stepped straight out of a romance novel cover. “Lucifer!” I shouted startled, grabbing at the sheet to cover myself again. “Aw come on, don’t hide, I was enjoying the view” He said with a big toothy grin. I shook my head, shooting Lucifer a pointed look. “Ughh fine then, time to get your sweet ass out of bed anyway, day’s a wastin", Lucifer replies uncrossing his arms, stalking toward the bed slowly, while his lips form the most sinful grin I’d ever seen in my life. Feeling unusually bold, I gather up the thin sheet and climb out of bed, making my way back to the bathroom, as I reach the door way I peak over my shoulder to see Lucifer, still staring intently watching my every movement. I drop the sheet and walk naked into the bathroom, letting Luci get a good look at my sweet ass. I smile to myself as I hear a soft “Damn” escape from his lips.

That first day alone with Lucifer went by in a blur. Never in a million years would I have thought Lucifer could be so attentive, patient, and soft. He made me feel so safe, it was so odd to think about because a couple of days ago I would have never imagined I’d be so close to him. But oddly enough, Lucifer was everything I didn’t know I needed. He understood my disdain for Chuck, empathized with it, he understood my rage & frustration. We spent hours together testing what I was capable of. Everything he asked me to do, making objects appear & vanish, _teleporting_? _Flying_? _Poofing_? I already figured out I could make that happen, but the first couple of times had been completely on accident. Today, with Lucifer’s help I was able to do it on purpose, several times. He pushed me just hard enough, to go farther and farther each time, he had a look of pure pride on his face the last time after we had come back to the cabin after I transported us to the top of one of the mountains that our cabin overlooked. Also found out today that I am as powerful as an archangel when I had playfully shoved him after he had made a rather sassy comment. It became clear that I was physically just as strong as him after I accidentally almost knocked him clear off his feet with that little shove. The following scuffle that ensued was one of the hottest things I’ve ever been a part of. Feeling him try to push me back against that oak tree, the face he made, and the growl that followed when he realized he couldn’t move me when I dug my heels into the ground. The moment I heard that animalistic growl I knew my panties would be an absolute soaking mess by the time we finished our playful little fight. Watching his eyes light up with his grace, feeling his lean body against mine, his hardness pressing into me as we wrestled on the ground for dominance, it was _stimulating_ to say the least. I’ll never forget the look on his face when I surprised him by flipping him over roughly & straddling his waist. I knew I had won our little game when I heard him moan my name after I had immediately started to grind my heat right onto his hard cock. The whole day was spent just like that, Lucifer and I teasing and shamelessly flirting with each other.

It was long after the sun had set when I finally made my way back to my room. I had just walked in & turned to shut the door behind me when I heard it. I spun around, quickly scanning the room, I swear I could hear Dean yelling out my name. I grabbed at my chest. I felt him, his guilt, his frustration, the intense longing before I heard him call out to me again. It overwhelmed me, the intensity of it, the weight in my chest, the ringing in my ears, it was dizzying. I heard him cry out my name one last time like a plea before the darkness surrounded me and I felt myself being dragged under by it.


End file.
